'A Boomer's Lament: Earbuds, Texting & Toilet Seats' Readers' Comments

 The "Boomer's Lament," I understand both points of view, being a boomer myself and having two kids who use their cell phones and do a lot of text messaging, but I feel that in some cases people are addicted to the technology and to the ability to have near-constant access to others. This reaches its extreme in the dangerous practice of texting while driving.

I was more struck with the part of the article having to do with the "boomer" work ethic and being available late. In some cases it is necessary depending on one's line of work, but often people make themselves too available when they should be taking care of themselves (especially one's physical and mental health) and their loved ones. It often takes courage to insist on one's well-being when so many voices are shouting to give up one's soul for the job. I have been willing to pay the price of being passed over for promotions because there is nothing as precious as one's soul. I have given my company much more than they have even asked for by being consistent for 20-plus years and always willing to help people on the job.

I never bought into the philosophy fully because upon studying it, I drew several conclusions about it. First, it seemed to me to be a bill of goods sold to the workforce by executives, roughly in the period from the 1970s to the 1980s, who wanted to cut costs and get more work out of their employees, regardless of the effect on the employee's family. Second, the emphasis on work is not only a generational trait, but also has a uniquely American component (though it also exists in some other cultures). In our country, a slogan found in a commercial, "A man is what he does," became a rallying cry, though in my mind a person is much more than what they do. In Europe an extended "holiday" is considered one's right, and Europe doesn't seem to be lagging behind us economically. Third, if we neglect ourselves or our families, we eventually pay the price for it, and the effects will invariably spill over into our work. Fourth, like children, we adults also need to play a little to be able to recharge our batteries, return to work fresh, and make good decisions (what Stephen Covey called "sharpening the saw"). Finally, I like to use some of my spare time not only for my family, but also to volunteer to serve in the community. I have struggled to maintain balance but after a lot of trial and error, I have more or less found it.

 This article is extremely interesting and some of the Boomer and even Gen-Xer feedback is alarming.  That fact that we'll soon have a significant amount of our workforce (Boomers) retiring/leaving the workforce & a new generation taking the lead (Gen-X)and we have not learned to work with the younger generation to pass off years of intellectual property and experience to make our organizations and our country better.
   Everyone is so focused on the differences rather than the collective similarities- we all want to get the job done. No one is focused on the fact that these generation differences delay our ability to innovate and leverage technology, etc. to expand our industrial might.  This miopic view the Boomers have is an example why the US automotive industry still lags behind the rest of the world in fuel/mileage standards- we have not looked beyond the 'Ol reliable gas guzzlers because it's new technology. We're comfortable with it.  "DARN those new fangled hybrids, I want my SUV" that only gets 13 Mpg.  
 Additionally,we have not adopted the work smarter, not harder concept.  Technology is a staff/force multiplier and the Millennial's ability to leverage technology to be more efficient at completing tasks should be something we all adopt or at least understand.  We might actually realize that it doesn't take a full day to produce full day's work. Case in point, look at the ground game that Barack Obama put in place using social networking sites (Facebook, MySpace, YouTube), TEXTING, the internet.  He blew John McCain, who was just learning to use the internet, off the charts as far as ground execution. Have you noticed that Millennials don't take that morning coffee break/water cooler chat the Boomers even Gen-Xer's do?  They come in with that Starbuck's cup and jump right in when they arrive.  For the companies that have Instant Messenger, or anything similiar, noticed that those Millennials are "online" at 1030/1100 pm at home?  But you think because they leave at 5 they are done with their work day?  Because you work onsite until 8 pm you believe you are actually more productive.  See the forest not just the trees.  Remember what the Greatest Generation thought about the Boomers- "they are a bunch of stoners with no work ethic." Sound familiar???

 We better learn and learn soon to work together despite the differences in technical acumen or we'll continue to watch the world pass us by.  Remember the next time you use that cellphone when your car breaks down, it's probably a Millennial network engineer who ensures your call goes through.

 I had mixed feelings about this article. I, too, am a baby boomer and grew up with a very strong work ethnic (even now I feel quilty if I'm too sick to come into work.)  I, too, complain about the lack of courtesy and what I perceive as lack of ability to think critically among young people.  Surprised, I embrace much of the new technology and can always be found in front of one computer screen or another.  I also own a Blackberry.  However, you lost me when you talked about your annoyance when employees were reluctant to respond to your messages during their off hours, including weekends. As someone who now regrets that she put her job first above all else, I envy young mothers who put their families before their jobs.  

With downsizing and layoffs, employees can no longer count on getting a job and working there for the rest of their lives.  Why should they be any more loyal than companies are to them.  My job is not coming to my funeral.  I would be very annoyed with a boss who expected me to be on call 24/7.  I work very hard at my job(s) and still do go beyond the call of duty (I was recently awarded for excellence in my workplace).

Way back when, when I worked and raised a family, I didn't bring my homelife into the workplace and I expect the workplace to stay out of my life.  

I would be very annoyed with a boss that wanted me at his beck and call during my off hours, and I would be apt to leave if my hard work during the workday was not enough.  Now when I see young mothers with new babies, I whisper to them to quit their jobs and take care of their babies at home.  I tell them to tell their hubands to get two jobs if necessary and to cut back on the luxuries because their kids need them.  I regret the day when women were told they could "do it all".  What a crock!  I know it is not practical for us all, but if I could go back, I'd take welfare if it meant I could be home with my kid.  

 I am a 21 year old student, and I feel the same way you do about these issues.  I do not text in class, and I do not like when people text while I am talking to them.  However, this summer, I started babysitting for a family who only texts.  My new employers would text me to see if I was available, and their kids would frequently text me, and send me pictures.  I did not and still do not fully understand how to act in this situation.  I find it uncomfortable, and I feel it crosses some boundary when the parents let their kids just call or text me at 10 pm.  It just seems weird

 I would like to share a story from our office. Our diversity trainers have emphasiszed that the firm needed to accommodate youmger workers in a world where talent was hard to find. Yet, we had one young co-worker who never quite understood the urgency of client requests especially if a request came in around lunch time or close to 5 PM. How was I to explain to clients that we had to adjust our demands for the new generation of workers? BTW, this employee was the first to go now that we are downsizing.

 I had to smile as I read this article.  I teach Freshman and Sophomore English at a community college, and at least half my students are Millennials.  They do not understand why I insist that they not email me in text messaging format.  They also have issues with my insisting their cell phones be off in class.  Several have tried the vibrate mode, and texting under the desktop, but most are detected.  One student almost hyperventilated when I suggested she just turn her phone off.  She told me she had never turned it off, and even takes it in the shower with her in a zip top bag. I suggested psychological help.

As far as the toilet seat problem, I'm not surprised at all.  You should hear some of the excuses I get for absences or requests for extensions on assignment dates. It's a new world!  

 I am 52 yrs old and in grad school with Gen Yrs. At first I was offended by them being on their laptops during class, but one evening wanted to understand them better, sat by them.

This is what amazed me. They were playing Texas Hold em with internet players, texting kinda secretavaly behind the laptop screens to their friends sitting in the row in front of them about their blind or internet dating oppt.

BUT... this is KEY...they followed the classroom instruction AND had valuable input throughout.

WOW!!! these kids really do have substance behind the technology.

 I must say I related all too well to this article.  Just one more lament to add:  Help me understand why 20-somethings are on their cell phone or blackberry while in the restroom, in the stall?  It takes "Can you hear me now" to a whole new level!

 The more flexible my company is with me (working from home, flexible hours, etc...) the more flexible I am with them (working on weekends and evenings).  If I am required to be in the office from 8-5 Monday through Friday, I am less likely to log in from home.  

Here is a really recent example.  I am a single mother of two elementary school aged children.  My kids both were out of school with head lice (GROSS!)  I found it early in the morning, began the de-lousing process and was all done by 9.  Barring sending the kids to school in a bubble, this was an unavoidable circumstance.  If I had been required to take a personal day, I would have hung out with the kids all day and watched movies.  Instead, I was able to be extrememly productive from my home office.  This allowed my critical project to keep on track. Win-win!

In this day and age, I think that companies need to be flexible.  With the tools that my company has provided me, laptop, BlackBerry, etc...I can be productive from almost anywhere at any time.

 Oh Barbara - you hit it out of the ball park this time! Help me understand why the job that pays for your lifestyle is not important enough to extend common courtesies to. The idea of a good work ethic needs to find its way back home to... the workplace!

 Thank you for the message. The key, I think, is the comment "as long as they get their work done." That should mean not just getting the bear minimum done, but doing your job very well, and truly being committed to our work in the context of it being one of the most important and productive parts of our life.

 No, you did not over-react. There is a sense with some younger employees today that they do not need to prove their worth and that they are entitled. That is of course not the case for the majority of younger employees, but I do think it is something that is much more prevelant today than in my generation. I also see it early with a lot of children. Maybe this is common for more affluent families, since we were working class I am not sure, could be a stereotype, but the bottom line is the author did the right thing and I am sure you are better off without her.

 This is a great article - I try to stay as up to date as I can on culture changes and technologies.  Luckily, my kids keep my up to date.  I don't understand the huge draw to texting - it takes me a long time to write a text.  I also don't understand instant messaging.  I still prefer to pick up a phone or stop by a desk - but I am aware that others don't.  One thing that I have noticed in those entering the work force is a feeling of entitlement and I don't think many know what "paying dues" are.  I do my best to balance life and work - but I know it is work that provides my family financial support.

 Barbara,

I chuckled as I read your article because I heard such comments so often when I reported my new book, "The Trophy Kids Grow Up: How the Millennial Generation Is Shaking Up the Workplace." I believe iPods and text messaging were the two biggest pet peeves of managers I interviewed. As for flexibility, I believe smart managers must meet the millennials halfway on this issue. Millennials must be in the workplace when business demands it, but at other times, what's so wrong with working remotely on your own time?

Ron Alsop

 From one Boomer to another, I had several chuckles while reading your post. I facilitate workshops and give presentations on understanding the generations at work, at home and all points in between. Invariably, someone (usually a Gen Y) will comment on the Boomers incessive need to "be seen" in the office working. They just don't get it. But as I stopped to ponder this subject, I began to understand that it was me who didn't get it. As long as the work gets done as requested, on time, what does it matter where it gets done?
As for fixing the toilet seat, I've found that if I have a viable reason behind a rule, these young workers will accept pretty much anything. However, if they are told that this is the rule - just deal with it - yes, they are probably going to find another employer. In some rather repressed way, I have to agree with them. After all, we Boomers spent a great amount of time during our youth rebelling against almost anything our elders held true.
Maybe if we just try talking, really communicating, our quandary with each other, new paths of understanding would open and conflict would be dramatically reduced.

I appreciated your article very much, however' the word toilet seat caught my interest. I am a baby boomer with juvenile arthritis and use an elevated toilet seat!
The line between diversity and diability is then. I often don't see people with disabilities included in diversity. I think that is a mistake.
For example, when I asked for an accessible bathroom, I was told I could use "donut hole" seat. I could carry it with me to a restroom.
A commode on most toilets with make the easiest and safest accomodation.
I was very angry with the response.
I needed ground level and parking which was worse.
I took the donut hole to work in the Phila School System.
I asked the Prin if I could keep it the office.
He suggested I carry it like a luch box.
I sent an memo stating I wanted to eat lunch together. I brought our lunches in the same bas as the donut hole. While humorous, the prin felt it was hostile.
I was transferred out and when I couldn't find parking to get in a building. I was not able to attend a meeting. I was asked to take leave until I undergo a medical eval. I have had offers withdrawn when I disclose disability related info.
I would appreciate any resources you may have and also share many experiences pos and negative.

Thanks for a good article.
Dorrie Iltis Cooper Psy.D.
School Psychologist

 I'm closer to 53 now than I am 52...I have seen a lot...normal as we knew it a few years ago is out the window...but, we still have a job to do...find new ways to get the job done...but, never allow or become disrespectful...flexibility to the employee...but remember the employer also needs flexibility from the employee...I'm glad that I can work "almost" anywhere...I have written some of my best reports in my backyard at a table near my self dug and installed fish pond...I'm a grandmother raising 4 grandkids (all 5 years and under - I'm "good" there are over 50,000 million grandparents doing the same thing today)...and I work full-time+...where would I be without flexibility...who would have thought I would need it now at 52+ more than ever...as for the earbuds in the ear while trying to work for me...I would be sunk...would not work for me...but, for the "younger" set...give me the numbers, give me the report when due, show me the productivity and I am good...I want results...as long as the ingredients are such that will give me a cake that taste like cake, smell like cake, look like cake, texture is like cake, and makes for a product that's marketable with a good return to the investment it works for me...I think some of the needs of the "Y's" that have been set in motion...is allowing us boomers to manage our lives...such as flexing to take care of the grandkids, have a meaningful worklife and still have quality of worklife...

Just my take...Thanks!

 A job is not 24x7 indentured servitude.  I am not available on week evenings or weekends, and frankly I'd be offended if an employer expected me to be.  There's more to life than working.  Much, much more.  

I wear headphones while I'm working for the same reason as the 20-somethings--to concentrate in the midst of many workplace distractions, and not to fiddle with playlists.  They weren't disagreeing you with, but giving you another reason for wearing headphones.

I do agree it's rude to text message or answer phone calls in the middle of meetings.

Not stay home from work unless I were at death's door?  I also find that ridiculous.  Was it written just to incite commentary?  One has to take care of oneself and one's health (one's production capacity), before being able to work.  Again, work shouldn't be indentured servitude where one is required to make personal sacrifices and tradeoffs that jeopardize one's health.  Life's too short as it is.

You have a change of heart at the end of your article, but like the rest of your article, it's not very convincing.